Today's deep thoughts: Winning Friends, etc.

From the chapter "Making People Glad to Do What You Want" in the book How to Win Friends & Influence People, by Dale Carnegie.

The effective leader should keep the following guidelines in mind when it is necessary to change attitudes or behavior:

  1. Be sincere. Do not promise anything that you cannot deliver. Forget about the benefits to yourself and concentrate on the benefits to the other person.

  2. Know exactly what it is you want the other person to do.

  3. Be empathetic. Ask yourself what it is the other person really wants.

  4. Consider the benefits that person will receive from doing what you suggest.

  5. Match those benefits to the other person's wants.

  6. When you make you request, put it in a form that will convey to the other person the idea that he personally will benefit.

[ . . . ]

People are more likely to do what you would like them to do when you use . . .


Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.